Black women occupy all the spaces but sometimes when we’re in certain spaces we may be the only woman, sometimes we’re the only black person or even the only person of color. Unfortunately, it can affect our feelings and emotions. Sometimes we’re also in spaces where we experience micro aggressions, micro insults, discrimination, sexism, racism, and it’s difficult dealing with those situations. Even outside of the workspace, we might be in situations that are are hard to deal with. In this blog post, I’m providing tips you can use when dealing with a difficult emotion or in a challenging situation. 

Tip #1

Don’t let anyone have your power. If someone controls your emotions, they control you. Now, I doubt you want anyone to have that level of satisfaction, we’re Audacious Black Girls, we do not give anyone that kind of pwoer. So if you’re in a situation when you feel like someone’s not treating you right, or it’s just frustrating, whatever it might be, take a moment to check in with yourself and think about how you want to respond. This allows you to really just check in to see what it is you want to do next. If someone controls your emotions, they control you. We’re not having that at all. Do you want them to take away your power? No. Do you want them to take anything away from you that speaks to your essence and the core of who you are? Do we want them to take you out of your character? No, not at all. We’re not giving that power away. 

What that means is you mind your emotions, so that no one has the control over you. Because if they get a response out of you, which is what they’re looking for, intentionally or unintentionally, then they’re controlling you

Tip #2

Ground yourself and plant your feet. Sometimes we get so out of body, whether you’re in situation that’s frustrating, or, you know, dealing with a difficult emotion, we might disconnect from ourselves. Now you can tell you’re disconnected because you might start feeling all of that emotion in the upper most part of your body. You may even feel like you can’t feel your feet. I know that’s something I go through some times and it feels like you’re having an out of body experience. Sometimes you’re not able to feel the ground because you’re living in the emotion. It’s really important to recognize that you are disconnected by noticing where those sensations seem to be at. Then find a way to connect back to yourself. You can do that by focusing your mind on something solid like the ground. You can begin by drawing your attention to your feet, then then the floor. Start to feel the floor under you and, ground yourself to that sensation. Another option, is maybe there’s a wall near you that you can lean against or touch just something sturdy, to just give you that little kick to remember, “oh, I’m here”. 

Tip #3

Find your breath. When we’re upset, frustrated, stressed or dealing with something challenging, we tend to forget to breathe. We’re not mindful about it. It’s the first thing that goes so bringing your attention to your breath. Feeling the sensation of the air as you inhale and exhale. You don’t even need to breathe deep, just find your natural breathe. As you’re breathing, you’re going to continue to ground yourself with the breathe. Remind yourself that no one has control over you.